Live, Laugh, Love

I realized I have not updated this blog in quite sometime...
ALOT has happened since October!

We were referred to Dr Foulk (Idaho Center for Reproductive Medicine) to try & figure out what exactly was causing my ectopic pregnancies. After one visit with Dr Foulk, I was told that my left tube is almost completely closed with scar tissue of some sort & my left ovary do not release my eggs that it should. "Plumbing problem, not product problem" is what Dr Foulk says every time he sees me.
With my history of ectopic pregnancies, Dr Foulk told Richard & me that in order for me get pregnant & be able physically have a baby, basically, our only option would be InVitro Fertilization (IVF).
So with this news, Rich & I jumped into this world of infertility with all our fingers crossed for the best. Richard has amazing insurance that covers 90% of all infertility.
Beginning late October/early November, I began to take hormone medication to start the "baby making process". This involved me giving my own shots in my stomach daily, crazy pregnancy cravings (from the medication) & the roller coaster mood swings! It certainly was difficult to go through all this, but I knew that it would all be worth it in the end. With Richard's help, I kept on focus for what all this was for... to have our family.
OK, skip to November 21, 2009. I went in to the doctor to have all my eggs removed. For this procedure they put me completely under general anesthesia. I had told the doc & ultrasound technicians before that I felt like my "vagina is falling out!" & they just giggled. When I woke up, Dr Foulk sat down & apologized for snickering about how I was physically feeling.... when he went to retrieve the eggs he realized why exactly I was feeling this way; I had 33 eggs harvested ("typical" egg retrieval is 9-16 eggs). He had seen them through the ultrasounds days prior to the retrieval, but never believed that they would have that many to pull from my ovaries!
November 23rd, Richard & I went in to the office for implantation. This was SO exciting to watch & know exactly when our baby(s) would be conceived. An hour after the implantation, we left the office & then started a week long "bed rest" session; consisting of me making a permanent butt print in my couch!
Two weeks later I had blood tests to show my pregnancy hormone levels going up & up & up (they look for your hcg hormone level to double every 48 hours). It was going great!
On December 23rd, we went in for our first ultrasound. I was a nervous wreck! So excited to see our baby(s)! As I was on the ultrasound table, I watched Linda's face (the ultrasound technician). I knew it could not be good news... and it wasn't. There was no heartbeat for the baby. We saw two perfect sacs (a gestational & yolk sac) where the baby should be, but nothing.
I made a follow up ultrasound for 7 days later... still no heartbeat, and the gestational sac had only 1 day growth in 7 days time. Natalie (our favorite Nurse/ultrasound tech) was not convinced with her results. She went to get Linda; Linda still found nothing. Linda then went to get Kara; still nothing. So here is Rich, Natalie, Linda & myself all in this room... crying... it was something none of us were expecting. And we were all in a state of denial.

We talked about the options.
1. Wait it out, but not too long. We did not want to risk infection..
2. D&C - out of the question because of my personal beliefs.
3. Take a medication called Cytotec to induce a miscarriage.

Our ultimate decision was to wait it out. I waited 14 days, and nothing was happening. I went in for an ultrasound & nothing had changed. Dr Foulk said it was time to take action because he did not want me to get an infection & risk more harm to myself. I decided to take the Cytotec. It certainly was a harsh medication; Cytotec induces a miscarriage at such an early stage, but is given to induce labor when further along. I had extremely bad cramping, lethargic most of the day & contractions! Probably the hardest physical thing I've ever had to go through.
The doctors office (both ICRM & St Als Women's Health) were amazing. Both offices were calling almost daily to get updates on how I was doing/feeling & make sure everything was going as good as it could be, considering the situation.

New Year, New Life! Late January/Early February 2010:
After much discussion with the doctor, we decided to look into doing a Frozen Embryo Transfer (FET). We are currently signed up for April 9th to do the FET! Currently, I am taking an estrogen supplement twice a week/ On April 6th, I will begin a high dose of progesterone oil daily!
I believe that Richard & I are much more prepared for the events this time. I am looking into doing acupuncture (recommended by Dr Foulk) to help reduce stress/pain that comes along with FET.

Through all of this, I have learned that nothing is more important in life then to LIVE your life, LAUGH as often as possible, & LOVE those who mean something in your life. Too often I take my life for granted & get caught up in it. I need to take more time to just sit back & be grateful for what I have & patient for what is to come!

I wanted to update this & let everyone know what exactly was going on with our "family situation". I am sorry if parts of it was TMI for some... If you have any questions/recommendations, please let me know! I am very open about it all & want everyone to know what we are going through!


Love to all!
Jessica McDonley